Unedited Transcripts

Chirurgia! with Jimmy Branagh (Unedited)

Stormy Stillwater will never tell Jimmy how his glasses offend him now that he has one eye, I mean how insensitive can this dude be? He sighs and sobs in silence
Myrtil Igaly: Awwww poor Stormy…
Aleph Oreo: (( gotta relog, feeling hopelessly warped, brb ))
Max Islay: better’n no eyes
Max Islay: no sight
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein smirks at Stormy, patting him on the head
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: There, that’s a better spot.
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein lifts his head towards Max, lifting a brow “So what if I am?”
Dr. Jimmy Branagh waves to Miss DME
Bookworm Hienrichs: Oh, dear – the Baronin is just a cloud to me.
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein: Likewise
Darlingmonster Ember: hullo good friends
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: She is usually on the lesser ‘engine during the day.
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein: Hello, Ms. Darling
Bookworm Hienrichs: Good day, Miss Ember!
Darlingmonster Ember: smiles at Dr Jimmy
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein: Aah
Max Islay waves to Dee
Wildstar Beaumont: greetings everybody
Dee Wells waves 🙂
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Hallo, Herr Admiral.
Bookworm Hienrichs watches bemused as first Miss Wells, then Mr. Beaumont, appear to walk through walls.
Tristizia Demonista: Good Evening to all 🙂
Max Islay: lol
Max Islay: Witchcraft!
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Herr Light.
Max Islay: giggle
Aleph Oreo attempts to stand in solidarity with his fellow urchlings
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Frau Light.
Zsophia Innovia: hello one and all
Bookworm Hienrichs: Hello, Professor!
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: I would suggest everyone not be shy, and move right up to the stage.
Nika Thought-werk curtsies quiety “Do your best, Mister Jimmy.”
Bookworm Hienrichs waves to Nika.
Bodhisatva Paperclip: Hello!
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: Thank you Miss Nika!
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein: Steady stream of people now!
Max Islay: steady stream of lag with them
Max Islay: lol
Max Islay: yikes
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein chuckles
Darlingmonster Ember: waves to M Paperclip
Max Islay: I may not survive this
Zsophia Innovia: ugh brb
Myrtil Igaly: Hey Nat!
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein tosses Max a roll of duct tape
Myrtil Igaly: ‘ello Miss Nika!
Myrtil Igaly: ‘ello everyone I missed!
Max Islay: lol too laggy to catch it :P~~
Max Islay: lmao
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein: Haha! Better go chase it down then
Nat Merit: lo
Nika Thought-werk: Hello, Miss Myrtil!
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein: Hello, Nat
Stormy Stillwater: Gee, thanks OBAMA!!! >:O for this lag
Darlingmonster Ember: M Wildmist is new and could use a chair when things settle
Max Islay watches the roll of duct tape lag out of sim and off into space :P~~
Max Islay: lmao
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Does anyone need a chair?
Darlingmonster Ember: jinx
Nat Merit: a chair would be useful
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein: Yes, please, Baron
Max Islay: no thanks, I bring my own
Max Islay: lol
Nika Thought-werk: Are they wooden?
Shaina Wildmist: Yes, please –
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: There’s those two…
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein attaches the chair to his butt and has a seat
Max Islay: lol
Max Islay: that’s what I did
Nika Thought-werk blinks, shrugs, takes out an old note and tosses it into her mouth.
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Hallo, Fraulein Stereo.
Max Islay: eating paper? heh fiber
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: ‘ello Capt. Stereo!
Nika Thought-werk: Good day, Captain.
Aleph Oreo: As long as it’s low acid paper…
Max Islay: hehe
Max Islay: wouldn’t want it to give you acid reflux
Max Islay: lol
Bodhisatva Paperclip: Hello, friends I’ve neglected to greet 🙂
Stormy Stillwater: Sup Sucka?
Nika Thought-werk: Oh … acid reflux?
Stereo Nacht: Good evening Herr Baron, Ms. Hienrichs, Mr. Branagh, Ms. Innovia, Mr. Merit, Miss Thought-Werk, Admiral Beaumont, Ms. Ember, Ms. Wildmist, Ms. Demonista, Professor Paperclip, Miss Igaly and everyone!
Darlingmonster Ember: waves to Cpt Nacht
Max Islay: something I know all to well of irl
Shaina Wildmist: Hello, Captain
Max Islay: Nike without pills I’d basically be on a bread and water diet irl
Max Islay: Nika*
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Fraulein Bookworm, if you would.
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein: That’s my typist as well
Bookworm Hienrichs edges carefully over the sim crossing.
Nika Thought-werk blinks “Nike?”
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein: Except bread is a no go
Bookworm Hienrichs: Welcome to this month’s Aether Salon! Today, Jimmy Branagh takes on a new role and regales us with a discussion of Victorian medicine and surgery!
Max Islay: typo
Zsophia Innovia: back
Nika Thought-werk blinks and quiets herself.
Bookworm Hienrichs: Before we proceed, some housekeeping reminders:
Bookworm Hienrichs: 1) To ensure you can hear the speaker, stand or sit on the patterned carpet.
Tristizia Demonista: welcome back
Bookworm Hienrichs: 2) If you do not have a wearable chair and wish one, please contact Baron Wulfenbach.
Bookworm Hienrichs: 3) Please remove all lag-feeding whatevers you might be wearing.
Bookworm Hienrichs: 4) A tip jar is out for our speaker. Do please show your appreciation!
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach points at the hot-chocolate table
Bookworm Hienrichs: 5) Any tips to help support the establishment will also be welcome – just click on one of the support signs, or on the floating dirigible!
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach points up
Bookworm Hienrichs chuckles.
AetherSalon: Hello.
Bookworm Hienrichs: 6) If you’re not a member of the AEther Salon group, there are signs that will let you sign up. You’ll be most heartily welcome!
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein checks his person for lag contributers
Bookworm Hienrichs: 7) Edited and unedited transcripts of these proceedings will be posted at AetherSalon.blogspot.com.
Aleph Oreo jettisons his urchin hud
Bookworm Hienrichs: And now, to introduce our speaker, here is Baron Klaus Wulfenbach.
Bookworm Hienrichs smiles.
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Welcome to the AEther Salon, everyone, it is good to see so many interested in medical techniques.
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein: Holy carp, I actually haven’t got any extras on for once
Aleph Oreo tugs at Nat “Siddown and be quiet!”
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Our speaker hardly needs any introduction in New Babbage, or, in fact, most of the Steamlands. Herr Doktor Jimmy Branagh, inventor of the mechanical musical liver, has been a contributor in many ways in many lands.
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein chuckles
Max Islay: mechanical musical liver? giggle
Darlingmonster Ember: 🙂
Myrtil Igaly waves to Jon
Max Islay ties Jon to the sim
Max Islay: lol
Jon Chen quietly waves back 🙂
Aleph Oreo applauds enthusiastically
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Therefore, without further ado – from Weffingham Medical Hospital and University, Surgeon Laureate and the BAR’s Man of the Year, Doctor Jimmy Branagh and his lovely assistant, Nurse Practitioner Myrtil Igaly.
Darlingmonster Ember applauds
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: Thank you Herr Baron
Myrtil Igaly: whaa?
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach bows
Bookworm Hienrichs applauds.
Darlingmonster Ember applauds
Nika Thought-werk claps.
Max Islay: ((oops wrong gesture lol))
Myrtil Igaly applauds wildly
Dr. Jimmy Branagh checks the patient on the table, then walks to the front of the stage, spreads his arms dramatically, and screams “I’VE BROKEN MY ARM! IT HAS SPLIT THE SKIN! MY GOD, I’M GOING TO DIE!”
Zsophia Innovia: applauds
Stereo Nacht: Get through, between the poster, Ms. Benelli!
Darlingmonster Ember gasps
Dr. Jimmy Branagh lowers his arms slowly.
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Side door, bitte.
Max Islay gasps
Aleph Oreo looks for blood
Max Islay: is there a doctor in the house?
Myrtil Igaly: uho..
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “Good evening ladies and gentlemen, and thank you for coming.”
Max Islay: Oh wait…
Max Islay: giggle
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “That statement, as dramatic and hyperbolic as it may seem, is true in our time. Today infection kills an average of one in six surgical patients. It is our greatest enemy!”
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “What you see behind me is a fair representation of a modern operating theater, with the galleries filled with anxious medical students and other learned men and women and mere interested persons ready to see the current techniques in modern surgical procedures.”
Miss Suzanne Super Sweet: shudders
Nika Thought-werk blanches.
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein nods
Aleph Oreo nods as if he knew of which was being spoken
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “A description by Dr. John Flint South is most amusing.”
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “The first two rows … were occupied by the other dressers, and behind a second partition stood the pupils, packed like herrings in a barrel, but not so quiet, as those behind them were continually pressing on those before and were continually struggling to relieve themselves of it, and had not infrequently to be got out exhausted. There was also a continual calling out of ‘Heads, Heads’ to those about the table whose heads interfered with the sightseers.”
Zsophia Innovia looks interested ears twitching
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “Patients put up with the audience to their distress because they received medical treatment from some of the best surgeons in the land, which otherwise they could not afford. Wealthy patients of the surgeons would have been operated on, by choice, at home probably on the kitchen table.”
Darlingmonster Ember takes notes
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “The risk of death at the hands of a surgeon was greatly increased by the lack of understanding of the causes of infection. Although cleanliness was a moral virtue, descriptions suggest that a surgeon was as likely to wash his hands after an operation as before.”
Darlingmonster Ember: erk
Aleph Oreo wonders if his own medical problems might ever be of sufficient note to be worth of such attentiion.
Max Islay imagines washing the kitchen table before a meal, and shudders
Dee Wells: Ew
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “The old frock coats surgeons wore during operations were, according to a contemporary, ‘stiff and stinking with pus and blood’. Beneath the table was a sawdust box for collecting blood.”
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “The death rate was further heightened by the shock of the operation, and because operations took place as a last resort, so patients tended to have few reserves of strength.”
Aleph Oreo recognizes the description “stiff and stinking”
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “Today I’d like to discuss some of those techniques and practices prevalent in our Enlightened Age, and also the development of some methods of anesthesia, and the growing trend of use of “antiseptics” to reduce the risk of infection following surgery, which takes the lives of one in six patients.”
Nika Thought-werk tries not to start heaving.
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “These new developments enhance the not only the level of comfort and quality of life in our time, but are also blazing a new path for upcoming generations.”
Aleph Oreo silently scoffs at the notion of “anitseptics”
Bodhisatva Paperclip munches popcorn
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “Now, we surgeons and doctors frequently receive high rank and prestige in our society, but even with all this new medical knowledge being discovered at a high speed, most of the people in the our age still rely on home remedies, herbal treatments and homemade prescriptions.”
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “Health suggestions are given either by a household manual or by word of mouth. Matrons, heads of households and frequently servants had adequate medical knowledge and remedies for minor ailments.”
Miss Suzanne Super Sweet notices the whincing woman in the painting
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “Even in affluent neighborhoods where the residents can afford doctors at will at least one member of any household will be well versed in herbal medicine, and people will frequently lance boils, sooth coughs and make poultices for wounds at home.”
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “This home-grown confidence and knowledge serves both as an alternative to and as ongoing support for professional aid.”
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “Common treatments given to people during the Victorian age included bleeding, purging, plastering, sweating, and amputation.”
Aleph Oreo shivers at the mention of “amputation”
Myrtil Igaly: ’tis what Nat got
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “These techniques help many people alleviate symptoms of a variety of painful disorders. Allow me to describe them briefly, as they are all quite useful. Please attend the viewer above.”
Tristizia Demonista: hopefully in that order
Cutea Benelli ponders amputating that cough she’s had lately
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “Plastering is a treatment that uses a paste made from a range of ingredients, including mud or plaster, and then applying such substances in the affected area of the patient to relieve internal pain or cold.”
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “Bleeding is done in an attempt to relieve high blood pressure, sweating was thought to expel poisons from the body, and amputation has been available for some time as a viable alternative to gangrene.”
Nika Thought-werk wonders about that …
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: ‘Poultices are used for bites, boils and wounds. Poultice ingredients could be as commonplaces as milk and bread to exotic herbs and cow manure.”
Aleph Oreo dry heaves at the mention of gangrene
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “Purging involves providing a patient with a heavy dose of emetics or laxatives to expel “poisons” from the individual’s body.”
Bodhisatva Paperclip giggles
Darlingmonster Ember scribbles copious notes
Aleph Oreo nods approvingly
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “Now, let us delve into some of the tools found in the most well equipped surgeries in the civilized world. Attend the pictographometer, please. Hopefully, these pictures will set you at ease as to the advancements available in the best hospitals.”
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “An amputation knife, for which purpose I believe obvious.”
Aleph Oreo shivvers
Myrtil Igaly shivers
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “A bone saw, also obvious.”
Tristizia Demonista gulps
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “This is known as a trephine, a fine precision instrument used for boring holes in the skull to relieve pressure, and to present the brain.”
Darlingmonster Ember: oh is that where i got that tool from….
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Ah, the trephine.
Dee Wells thinks of Nymlet…
Zsophia Innovia: are chiking
Aleph Oreo hopes his brain does not require presenting
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “The skull saw, for use when one is required to remove a large part of the cranium.
Stereo Nacht: I think you prefer a motorized one, Herr Baron?
Cutea Benelli: free your mind, and the rest will follow.
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: I prefer one of those, ja.
Myrtil Igaly: Woah, that skull saw looks fancy
Nika Thought-werk: It looks like a blender.
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “Who can tell me what this little gem is?”
Nat Merit: first one not used on me 😛
Nat Merit: ((not rezzed))
Darlingmonster Ember: eyelash straightener?
Stereo Nacht: For bleeding?
Aleph Oreo raises his hand Oohh oohhh
Zsophia Innovia: hum?
Zsophia Innovia: not seeing it
Bodhisatva Paperclip: Lime zester?
Dee Wells: It looks like it hurts
Dee Wells: A lot
Aleph Oreo: A scarification device?
Jon Chen: Looks vicious, whatever it is!
Nika Thought-werk: Pepper grinder?
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: Excellent Miss Nacht!
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “It is an artificial leech! When the little creatures are unavailable, this will bore into the skin and permit bloodletting.”
Darlingmonster Ember: ah, handy
Cutea Benelli: how utterly practical!
Aleph Oreo nods approvingly
Stereo Nacht: Thank you Doctor! I may not be one, but I had to assist a few on battle fields… 😉
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “And finally, a general surgery kit containing most of the instruments necessary for on-location surgeries, carried by most doctors.”
Nika Thought-werk: Did they wash it with each use?
Cutea Benelli: there’s no good deeding unless it’s bleeding (old german saying i just made up)
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “We do not have the time today to cover the mechanics and machineries of modern medicine, but I found this remedy for scoliosis most amusing!”
Dee Wells: hehe
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach chuckles
Bodhisatva Paperclip: Egad!
Stereo Nacht: Depends on how much time they have between patients, I’d think, Miss Thought-Werk!
Cutea Benelli thinks the doctor most probably does not suffer from scoliosis
Nika Thought-werk: Poor woman …
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “And now, let’s briefly note some matters of anesthesia.”
Nika Thought-werk: It’s a moving cage.
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “Anesthesia has been often limited to a mug of rum and a stick to bite on. However, there is a history of interesting techniques and agents that have shown much promise. Unfortunately, these have been dismissed or oft forgot by medical science, and slow communications often limit the spread of ideas.”
Dee Wells pulls out a flask
Jon Chen: it just rezzed for me — gads!!!
Stereo Nacht: Bah. Hit them hard enough… ;-P
Tristizia Demonista: seems fainting at the sight of these instruments is the most common form of anesthesia …..
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “Ignaz Philipp Semmelweis was a Hungarian physician of German extraction now known as an early pioneer of antiseptic procedures. Described as the “savior of mothers”, Semmelweis discovered that the incidence of puerperal fever could be drastically cut by the use of hand disinfection in obstetrical clinics. Puerperal fever was common in mid-19th-century hospitals and often fatal, with mortality at 10%-35%.”
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “Semmelweis proposed the practice of washing with chlorinated lime solutions in 1847 while working in Vienna General Hospital’s First Obstetrical Clinic, where doctors’ wards had three times the mortality of midwives’ wards. He published a book of his findings in Etiology, Concept and Prophylaxis of Childbed Fever.”
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “Despite various publications of results where hand-washing reduced mortality to below 1%, Semmelweis’s observations conflicted with the established scientific and medical opinions of the time and his ideas were rejected by the medical community. Some doctors were offended at the suggestion that they should wash their hands and Semmelweis could offer no acceptable scientific explanation for his findings.”
Zsophia Innovia: was not Listerine orignally created for this?
Aleph Oreo: If I can’t see the thing that kill me, it’s not real!
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “Semmelweis’s practice earned widespread acceptance only years after his death, when Louis Pasteur confirmed the germ theory and Joseph Lister, acting on the French microbiologist’s research, practiced and operated, using hygienic methods, with great success.
Aleph Oreo hushes himself
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “In 1865, Semmelweis was committed to an asylum, where he died at age 47 after being beaten by the guards, only 14 days after he was committed.”
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Bitte, hold all questions until the end of the presentation. There will be time.
Darlingmonster Ember: awwww
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein grimaces
Dr. Jimmy Branagh pulls a flask from his coat pocket and takes a glug.
Stereo Nacht facepalms “What a shame; another great mind who needed a protector.”
Myrtil Igaly: Poor Semmeleleweweis
Nika Thought-werk frowns.
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “The first of the three clinical innovations was the introduction of ether in America in 1846 and chloroform in Britain in 1847. Inhalation of the vapors of these compounds not only put people to “sleep” making them insensible to pain, but, as one Victorian surgeon declared, its use meant that patients were “rendered unconscious of torture.”
Myrtil Igaly: Oh that’s progress
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “This was a boon not only for those who chose to go under the knife but also for those who wielded it, because surgeons no longer had to contend with patients who squirmed around on the operating table during an amputation-or who tried to escape altogether.”
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: So awkward.
Stereo Nacht: The ennemy of Ms. Dupree! 😉
Darlingmonster Ember: “wait, I’ve changed my mind!”
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Ja, straps are efficient.
Aleph Oreo meditates upon “escape”
Jon Chen: things we no longer concern ourselves with, today….
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “In 1867, the Glasgow-based surgeon, Joseph Lister, put forward his system of antiseptic surgery. Lister was correct in his view that surgical wound infection was the result of bacteria. But his methods to combat their action were cumbersome, constantly changing, and confusing.”
Nat Merit: that would’ve been nice :/
Nika Thought-werk: Run – run – there goes the leg! Hop! Hop …
Aleph Oreo: Rum? did someone offer rum?
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “He noted that Friedlieb Runge had discovered “creosote”, which later was processed into carbolic acid. Although Runge had no understanding of how decomposition occurred, the chemical had been used to treat the wood used for railway ties and ships since it protected the wood from rotting.”
Miss Suzanne Super Sweet: that foot looks fine
Cutea Benelli: rum rum there goes the keg?
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein: Oh dear
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “Later, it was used for treating sewage in England, Belgium and Holland. The same chemical was also used to fight parasites and reduce the odors during cholera and cattle plague.”
Bodhisatva Paperclip thinks it sounds very useful
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “Therefore, Lister tested the results of spraying instruments, the surgical incisions, and dressings with a solution of it. Lister found that carbolic acid solution swabbed on wounds remarkably reduced the incidence of gangrene.”
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “In August 1865, Lister applied a piece of lint dipped in carbolic acid solution onto the wound of an eleven-year-old boy at Glasgow Infirmary, who had sustained a compound fracture after a cart wheel had passed over his leg. After four days, he renewed the pad and discovered that no infection had developed, and after a total of six weeks he was amazed to discover that the boy’s bones had fused back together, without the danger of suppuration.”
Myrtil Igaly: Yay!!
Jon Chen: Brilliant 🙂
Aleph Oreo applauds
Cutea Benelli: fusion!
Bodhisatva Paperclip: Lucky kid (eventually)
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “His techniques included varying dilutions of carbolic acid, also known as phenol, and an array of putty, tin, and rubber protective devices. He also used vaporizing sprays that emitted an unpleasant and irritating acidic mist in the vicinity of patient and surgeon, but later denounced the use of this equipment.”
Darlingmonster Ember: !!! SCIENCE !!!
Aleph Oreo adds “suppuration” to his vocabulary.
Jon Chen: This is the moment that science was invented 🙂
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “By the 1880s, antiseptic surgery, or “Listerism” as it has come to be known, had transformed into aseptic surgery as knowledge about pathogenic bacteria accumulated. Surgeons now concentrated their efforts on excluding disease-causing bacteria from incisions and amputation sites by ensuring that their own hands had been thoroughly cleaned and their street clothes were covered by clean white gowns; later, they began to wear caps, masks, and rubber gloves.”
Stereo Nacht: Well, that’s how science goes: you test an hypothesis; if your experiments disproves it, you change hypothesis!
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “These practices are not yet widespread, however. An operating table is most likely cleaned by a splash from of bucket of water, leaving the previous patient’s bodily fluids free to mingle with the next patient’s.”
Miss Suzanne Super Sweet: ewe
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “And now, a word on amputations.”
Jon Chen: oh my.
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “The best of the best surgeons can remove an arm off at the shoulder in 17 seconds, whereas trainees (as they don’t have anything to practice on) will often hack away, and then use pliers to snap off bones, and tweezers to remove splinters, and for the final act the stump was then sealed with boiling tar. Sadly the patients usually die.”
Nika Thought-werk frowns.
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Hrm.
Bookworm Hienrichs winces.
Aleph Oreo shudders
Stereo Nacht: Ack. X-\
Bodhisatva Paperclip munches more popcorn
Jon Chen: omg
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: Here’s a story.
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “Submitted for your approval …”
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “It’s just after midday on a late spring day in 1842 and the wooden viewing galleries that surround the operating room of University College Hospital in London are packed.”
Darlingmonster Ember: 🙂
Nika Thought-werk: I like stories …
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “Sir Robert Liston, the foremost surgeon of his age, and a man whose temper is as sharp as his chiselled features, is about to begin work.”
Zsophia Innovia looks contemplative
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “The assembled crowd of anxious medical students dutifully check their pocket watches, as two of Liston’s surgical assistants – ‘dressers’ as they are called – take firm hold of the struggling patient’s shoulders.”
Aleph Oreo winces
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “The fully conscious man, already racked with pain from the badly broken leg he suffered by falling between a train and the platform at nearby King’s Cross, looks in total horror at the collection of knives, saws and needles that lie alongside him.”
Myrtil Igaly: “watch the gap…”
Nika Thought-werk frowns harder.
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “Liston clamps his left hand across the patient’s thigh, picks up his favourite knife and in one rapid movement makes his incision.”
Zsophia Innovia is very glad she ins in that position
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “A dresser immediately tightens a tourniquet to stem the blood.”
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “As the patient screams with pain, Liston puts the knife away and grabs the saw.”
Aleph Oreo winces in sympathetic agony
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “With an assistant exposing the bone, Liston begins to cut.”
Jon Chen: such horror….
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “Suddenly, the nervous student who has been volunteered to steady the injured leg realises he is supporting its full weight. With a shudder he drops the severed limb into a waiting box of sawdust.”
Aleph Oreo nods as if that is the way of things
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “Liston, however, is still busy, tying off the main artery of the thigh with a reef knot and then tying off other smaller blood vessels, at one point even holding the thread in his mouth. As the tourniquet is loosened, the flesh is stitched.”
bleue lacroix throws up and tries to kick it under the sofa
Nat Merit: it hurts that does, take it from me
Myrtil Igaly: Poor Nat…
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “The operation is over. And it has taken just 30 seconds.”
Dr. Jimmy Branagh grins
Silas Merlin is feeling ill, whispers ‘sorry’ and leaves
Nika Thought-werk: In his … mouth?
Darlingmonster Ember: amazing
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Very deft.
Zsophia Innovia: happily short time less pain I would hope
Cutea Benelli: let’s hope liston used listerine then
Nat Merit: yeah all the cleaning and stuff takes longer than the cutting
Bodhisatva Paperclip puts down his popcorn
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “I had planned to give you today, ladies and gentlemen, a demonstration of the hammer-and-leather punch method of pre-frontal lobotomy.”
Aleph Oreo gulps
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “But unfortunately I have received news that my scheduled subject has recently been elected to high political office and is unavailable.”
Zsophia Innovia shudders
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein smiles sympathetically to Nat
Stereo Nacht: I’d think a guillotine would be even faster…
Myrtil Igaly: hehehe
Darlingmonster Ember: snerks
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach chuckles
Bodhisatva Paperclip: Awww…. 😦
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “THEREFORE!”
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein chuckles
Aleph Oreo looks mystified for a moment, then laughs like an idiot.
Dr. Jimmy Branagh pauses dramatically.
Zsophia Innovia: would be better off under the hammer
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “I have decided to attempt to better Dr. Liston’s famous time of amputation right here before your eyes!”
Myrtil Igaly: Yay!!
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein: Ooh
Jon Chen: omg!
Nika Thought-werk claps.
Dee Wells starts thinking of excuses to leave…
Jon Chen: The bleeding edge of Modern Science!!!
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “The man you see here on the table has a leg already infected with gangrene, and it simply must come off if the man is to survive the week.”
Nat Merit: you aint having any more of my limbs 😛
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein chuckles at Nat
Zsophia Innovia: I have a golie I can volunteer
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “He is securely restrained, and appears …”
Bodhisatva Paperclip picks up his popcorn again
Aleph Oreo leans closer
Dr. Jimmy Branagh leans over and looks …
Dee Wells turns pale
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “… to be quite unconscious. Drunk in fact. With luck, he will sleep through the entire procedure and be none the worse for wear.”
Dee Wells: Except lighter
Jon Chen: “…with luck…”
Nika Thought-werk: Saw, detach, rinse tools, rpeat?
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach leans forward
Stereo Nacht volunteers to hit him should he awaken
Dr. Jimmy Branagh grins and claps his hands
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “Well, shall we begin?”
Darlingmonster Ember takes out her sketchbook and pencils
Myrtil Igaly: Let’s!
Aleph Oreo nods
Dr. Jimmy Branagh cinches up the tourniquet around the man’s leg, then picks up the large amputation knife, and begins
Zsophia Innovia watches carefully and nodds
Aleph Oreo cringes but can’t tear his eyes away
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “As some of you may know … it’s much like … cutting into a moderate sized ham …”
Jon Chen: omg!
Bookworm Hienrichs starts at the sounds.
Dr. Jimmy Branagh tosses the amputation knife into the pan and grabs the bone saw.
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Not drunk enough.
Stormy Stillwater: Damn girl!
Zsophia Innovia pulls out the smellin salts for who needs it
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein winces, tipping his sensitive ears back
Aleph Oreo: He wasn’t drunk enough
Nika Thought-werk looks away.
Darlingmonster Ember pretends she does not know.
Dr. Jimmy Branagh saws rapidly with the bone saw.
Cutea Benelli: good lord that messed up my speakers
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “Whoopsie!”
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: He must have fainted, finally.
Dee Wells: ((The blood spray is horrific XD))
Darlingmonster Ember: carry on
Cutea Benelli chuckles
Stereo Nacht: Problem?
Miss Suzanne Super Sweet: Oh my
Zantabraxus looks fascinated
Dr. Jimmy Branagh then ties off the main arteries with a great flourish.
Bixyl Shuftan covers his mouth and folds his ears “Excuise me”
Stormy Stillwater: Jimmy, you have a sick mind… I am proud to be your friend
Darlingmonster Ember checks her watch
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein chuckles
Jon Chen: !
Tristizia Demonista chuckles
Dr. Jimmy Branagh hums while he works “Dumdeedum deedum …”
Zsophia Innovia: looks like you may need nore sawdust
Myrtil Igaly: hehe
Aleph Oreo justifies his aversion to doctors
Dr. Jimmy Branagh slaps a glob of boiling hot tar to the stump, instantly cauterizing it.
bleue lacroix: grossest. thing. ever.
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: You’d best not walk on my carpets until you’ve cleaned your shoes, young man.
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein chuckles at the Baron
Darlingmonster Ember applauds
Darlingmonster Ember applauds
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach applauds
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “I believe, success! You may applaud now!”
Myrtil Igaly applauds wildly
Dee Wells: Radical weight loss program, there
Bodhisatva Paperclip: Splendid work!
Jon Chen: applauds.
Aleph Oreo applauds
Bixyl Shuftan claps
Zantabraxus applauds
Darlingmonster Ember applauds
Doctor Avalon: applauds
Tristizia Demonista applauds
Darlingmonster Ember: astounding
Zsophia Innovia: well done sir
Stormy Stillwater: 0_0 Nice…
Stormy Stillwater: ..wooooo……
Stormy Stillwater: …that is real nice, B. >_<
Nat Merit applauds then rubs his stump
Doctor Avalon: “Bravo! Bravo!
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein: Very well done
Dr. Jimmy Branagh whips the blanket over the again unconscious patient.
Bookworm Hienrichs: ((Oh, my, this is going to make for an interesting photo set!))
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “The dressers will come down soon and finish up.”
Myrtil Igaly: I bet you didn’t scream like that Nat
Nika Thought-werk claps and wonders who Mister Jimmy practiced on to get so good.
Stereo Nacht does *not* volunteer to clean up the blood
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein chuckles at Book
Miss Suzanne Super Sweet: You dropped his leg and saved his life
Dr. Jimmy Branagh grins.
Zsophia Innovia: a small price to pay
Nat Merit: this is all too familiar :s
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: “And that, ladies and gentlemen completes today’s presentation. I again thank you for attending, and should you have questions, I will do my best to answer them now, or later should that be necessary.”
Darlingmonster Ember: quite exciting!!!
Jon Chen raises a hand…
Miss Suzanne Super Sweet: What happens to the leg?
Aleph Oreo nods
Dee Wells: Until the bill comes
Bookworm Hienrichs applauds, and points again to the speaker tip jar in the back, on the refreshment table.
Nat Merit: at least this bloke got to be asleep
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: Yes young man.
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Herr Surgeon’s tipjar is on the table near the door.
Stereo Nacht: Miss Thought-Werk, I believe a few pirates have been “volunteered” for Dr. Branagh’s studies! 😉
Nat Merit: Gadget gets to keep the leg in a pickle jar
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: Oh, also!
Jon Chen: Could we say that this is the start of the scientific method as we know it?
Nat Merit: or maybe that’s just mine
Jon Chen: With semmelweiss?
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: A gift for all the attendees in appreciation.
Zsophia Innovia: I believe a doctor Sfrakenstien my be interested in the limb!
Tepic Harlequin rouses slightly…
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: The white box to my right is for all of you
Bookworm Hienrichs laughs at the gift.
Myrtil Igaly: Thank you!
Darlingmonster Ember: you are such a gent, Dr Jimmy
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: Splendid.
Myrtil Igaly: Will the patient survive?
Tepic Harlequin: ..ss.. wazz … i’s misssed anyfin?…
Nika Thought-werk wonders.
Jon Chen nudges Tepic….
Bodhisatva Paperclip: Oooo! A museum piece!
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein: Thank you, Jimmy
Nika Thought-werk: Thank you, Mister Jimmy.
Bookworm Hienrichs: Are there any other questions for Dr. Jimmy?
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein: Ah, this will be very nice in the hospital too!
Jon Chen: Well done Jim 🙂
Darlingmonster Ember: many thanks!
Dee Wells: Excellent, Jimmy 🙂
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: I hope you all enjoyed it
Nat Merit: bravo!
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein: And excellent presentation
Shaina Wildmist: Thank you, Dr. Branagh
Darlingmonster Ember: I feel I have a leg up on the medical world
Nat Merit: it’s much more enjoyable when you’re only a spectator
Aleph Oreo claps loudly, hoping his noise is interpreted as praise, not distraction of the attention of his betters.
Nika Thought-werk raises her hand.
Bodhisatva Paperclip: Yes, excellent lecture. A cut above, you could say.
Bookworm Hienrichs chuckles.
Tristizia Demonista: Thank ou very much Dr. Branagh
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: Yes Miss Nika?
Nika Thought-werk: People never sued the doctors for killing them?
Myrtil Igaly: hehe
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach raises his eyebrows
Nika Thought-werk blinks.
Stereo Nacht: wrong century, I’d think! 😉
Nika Thought-werk: Oh!
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: I’m sure there were lawsuits, but few. Doctors were extremely respected
Aleph Oreo still grows faint at the thought of mere needles.
Nika Thought-werk nods and feels sorry for all the people that suffered.
Myrtil Igaly: Eh, Future people will feel sorry for us
Nika Thought-werk: Great job, Mister Jimmy.
Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein: And much needed
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: Yes
Zsophia Innovia: would you like smelling salts?
Miss Suzanne Super Sweet: fascinating. Thank you, Dr. Jimmy
Aleph Oreo needs some smelling salts…
Zsophia Innovia: very informative
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: We will be the barbarians, and they centuries after them
Zsophia Innovia: here you go
Bookworm Hienrichs: Well, I want to thank you all for coming, and hope we’ll see you again next month, at our usual date of the third Sunday of the month (May 18th), when Miss Nika Thought-werk pulls double-duty for this season and talks about the mail service!
Myrtil Igaly: Hey Tully!
Jon Chen: ooo 🙂
Dee Wells: Yay!
Dr. Jimmy Branagh applauds
Nat Merit: if there are any future people, it’s almost the end of the world every other year
Darlingmonster Ember: Oh good show
Darlingmonster Ember: woot
Bookworm Hienrichs: And I’d best log off before the next round of weather arrives… *sigh*
Myrtil Igaly: True Nat
Tully: I heard there would be meay after the medical demonstration
Aleph Oreo: Thank you, Dr. Branagh!
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: Thank you again everyone
Dee Wells: Aww, take care, Book 🙂
Tully: Dp we know who the sandwiches are?
Myrtil Igaly: There’s a leg if you want Tully
Doctor Avalon: waves “I must be going, but I shall be back
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: We have about five minutes left before I pick up the tipjar.
Nika Thought-werk curtsies “Be well, one and all.”
Tepic Harlequin: time to check the traps…….
Bookworm Hienrichs winces as she listens to the wind howl, and disappears quickly.
Stereo Nacht: Thank you for the demonstration, most instructive, Mr. Branagh!
Baron Klaus Wulfenbach: There is a tea-cart on the Academy side with snacks.
Dr. Jimmy Branagh waggles his jaw
Bookworm Hienrichs waves.
Dr. Jimmy Branagh: Now Oy can talk reg’lar again!

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